dear real world, i hate you.

since being thrust into the proverbial "real world" after college graduation, i've learned several things- chief among them that no one (in the professional world, anyway) cares about you and that you sure ain't the "unique snowflake" college made you feel like. but for god sakes, interviewers, would it kill you to send one lousy e-mail to tell me that i didn't get the job?!

i can handle rejection, trust me. at this point, my most-oft heard phrase "someone with more experience" has become the air i breathe. okay, i'm being a little dramatic. but really, when i send you an e-mail to follow up about the status of a position that i spent my time, money, and possibly gas to interview for, the least you can do is give me a quick "sorry, but we went with someone else." it's common courtesy, people. even worse is when you respond with a "we're still making up our minds" and then....nothing. i can't count how many times i've had to stalk linkedin to find out who actually got the position after a month of silence from the employer!

basically, in the words of one stephanie tanner, "HOW RUDE." so let's get it together, folks. just keep a girl posted.  you'll only bruise my ego for a minute or two.

idol, i'll never let go.

no matter what happens in my life, there are some things that i can always count on. one of these things is american idol. 

seriously, i don't even care- I LOVE THIS SHOW. i can remember having a freakout on my living room floor in anticipation of kelly clarkson's crowning during the first season. i used to put idol performances from the likes of corey clark and josh gracin (anyone? anyone?) on the mix cds i made in high school because they made me laugh. and i took true pride in my taylor hicks "soul patrol" impression. now, with the advent of social media, i'm completely addicted to "live-tweeting" idol. no big.

 i am a bit surprised that it became the phenomenon that it did. but when it comes down to it, it's a talent competition. and everyone loves talent competitions! also, everyone (secretly) loves simon cowell. what's with the constant backlash, y'all?anyways, this season is proving to be one of the best yet, and here are my favorites:

allison- for a 16 year-old, girl can SANG.

anoop- known affectionately as "anoop-dogg."

jorge- i think it would be fantastic if the american idol was puerto-rican.

matt- elliott yamin v 2.0? perhaps.

give me your puppy, miley.

SERIOUSLY.

whoa-whoa

taylor hanson? james iha? bun e. carlos from cheap trick? adam schlesinger from fountains of wayne? which one of these is not like the other? well, i don't know, and i really don't care, but i want more of it, dammit. let's face it- they had me at taylor hanson, but this "tinted windows" supergroup (and their first single "kind of a girl") is like a giant crunchy genius power-pop nugget that i can't help but bite right into. i'm so thrilled that they're getting overwhelmingly positive reactions thus far, too. just watch!!



yum.

careers for thought: 8 things i'd also love to do.

my unfortunate period of unemployment (i mean, um, my transition period to full-time employment!) has left me with some time to think about other possible career paths. and since one of my most-often asked interview questions is "what is your dream job?" (which, in my opinion, is an inherently stupid question- what am i supposed to say, "this one!!"? come on now!), i've come up with some good- if not far-fetched- answers to respond with. a girl can dream, right?!

1. traveling chef/tv host/food critic

okay, so i'm lacking the culinary skills, but we can overlook that. seriously, can you imagine anything cooler than getting to travel to fabulous places and pig out all day?! because really, i can't. at all. ever.

2. fbi detective

for goodness sakes, i found my birthparents through intensive google searches, and my ability to track things and people down is pretty scary. i could totally hang with the folks at the behavorial analysis unit.

3. sober living house manager

i think the celebrity rehab spin-off "sober house" prooobably sugar-coats it, and most of these house managers are recovering addicts themselves, but i'd actually really like to work with substance abusers post-rehab, though it could potentially get really depressing. yikes!

4. matchmaker

playing cupid could be a total blast (not to mention rewarding if you're successful!), but it would be even more fun to alert the jerks that they're, well, jerks. right??

5. lawyer

i was a total mock trial ace in the heydays of middle and high school- always the prosecuting attorney, though. someone did make an objection once because i was "badgering the witness," but whatever, i wanted answers!

6. fashion buyer

i'd get paid to shop. 'nuff said.

7. set designer

how cool would it be to dream up the decor for a fictional character's apartment, or a favorite local coffeeshop? pretty damn cool, i say.

8. wedding planner

dealing with psycho bridezillas could get stressful, yes, but organizing the music, the table linens, the menu...oh my!

this is a total list-in-progress, so if anyone has any ideas for other awesome jobs, give me a shout.

i was once where you at, punk.

omg! since my last post, it seems like all hell has broken loose: the smithsonian wants to display aretha franklin's ridiculous hat, rihanna and chris breezy are in the midst of "domestic disturbia '09" (thanks ohnotheydidnt), and i've been interviewing like a madwoman...kinda...and despite my recent rant about social media, i've been completely sucked into twitter and there's no going back. come on, you have to admit that seeing a "tweet" from shaq (yes, the basketball player) that says "Ok i admit it i ate performance enhancing frosted flakes 2 yrs ago, lol" is just a beautiful thing.

fortunately, despite all of the madness, i've had time to come upon two novel lil' sites that i'd like to share with all of you.

1. fmylife.com: true to its domain name, this site houses tons and tons of submitted blurbs from folks who had experiences that just made them throw up their hands and say, well, you know.

2. sorry-mom.com: a treasure trove of "oops" one-night stand and "wtf was i thinking?!" boyfriend profiles, complete with photos edited to protect the identities of the not-so-innocent.

and the best superbowl spot goes to...

hulu, hands-down! i want to shake this copywriter's hand.



and pepsi's "i'm good" has to be runner-up.



overall, an improvement on last year's ads, but still kinda underwhelming.

in other news, everyone needs to see "slumdog millionaire." totally lives up to the hype.

oh, the perils of social networking!

silly me. for a moment, i thought terms like "the digital space" and "developing your personal brand" were only used by pretentious emersonites during DOTM (diarrhea of the mouth) attacks in class. but as i've gotten deeper and deeper into the job hunt, i'm slowly realizing that social media is the wave of the future, man. and i might just not be able to live- or succeed in my career- without fully embracing it. but can i keep up?!

you see, i've always considered myself to be at least semi-hip and interested in the next big thing. myspace? i was there (though now, you couldn't pay me to update my profile more than once every 6 months.) facebook? sure. back in the days of livejournal, i was the queen of updates and comments, i assure you!

but now, i'm supposed to be blogging and tweeting and linked in and digging and well-versed in "web 2.0", and it's really becoming all too much to handle. i mean, whatever happened to a good ol' fashioned poke on facebook? isn't that helping to expand my network, too?

sure, i'm signed up for most of those previously-mentioned sites (i have to at least make an effort!) but someone just might need to save me before i drown in the sea of social media.

the japanese are singing tora, tora, tora...

i truly wish obama all the best upon his inauguration, but i came across this clip today of maryland senator lisa gladden and just have to say....REALLY?!! good god, people.

like a hitman, like a dancer

THINGS I LOVE RIGHT NOW:

1. wonderful spells

though i had the good fortune to catch these guys live a couple times in boston and fell in love, i just rediscovered them on the heels of their brand new EP, "the haunted garage," and i'm so thrilled that i did. a bunch of music and art students by day and straight-outta-the-60's rockers by night and dreamy to boot? yes please. watch "bad news blues," and you'll see what i mean.


2. i was told there'd be cake

my dear friend jen sent me this collection of essays by sloane crosley for christmas, and i think it was probably the perfect time in my life to read this. griping about first-job woes, apartment foibles, and collecting ponies (?), it's laugh-out-loud funny and the best book i've read in a long time. it also made me feel better to find out that ms. crosley is 30- older than i had imagined- because at least i still have, like, 8 years to amass a collection of my own funny anecdotes. anyways, read it!

3. the real world: brooklyn

who was i kidding? after about a 3-year hiatus from watching this trainwreck, i finally got reeled back in with last year's hollywood cast, and still can't look away. dolphin trainer? check. iraq war vet? check. mormon who swears he ain't gay? check. kind-hearted transsexual? check. roided-up gym rat? check. to be honest, i was expecting a lot worse, but this show is like television crack, and i'll be getting my fix every week, thank you.

go away, joe jonas!

happy 2009, all! as is tradition, christine and i came up with a predictive word for the new year- and we figured, since 2008 was a pretty all-around rotten year, we decided that this would be the year of "splendor," and it basically has to be, by default.

since new year's eve was baaasically blizzard conditions, emily came over and we drank a couple- make that many- glasses of wine and had a grand ol' time (the title of this post was aptly taken from my last words of '08, cursing the metrosexual toolbag himself while he danced around on "dick clark's rockin' eve.") ANYWAYS, i made a list of 100 things to do in '09- not necessarily goals, mind you, as i may have done them before, but that seemed more plausible than setting unrealistic expectations, y'know?! it was way harder to come up with them than i thought, for sure. these include:

-GET A FULL-TIME JOB
-take a cruise
-document every month with photos
-send out christmas cards
-play pub trivia
-compliment a stranger
-complete the crossword every day for a month
-improve my handwriting
-yelp about 10 places i've been
-get a passport
-floss every day
-sell something on ebay
-read 50 new books
-see 50 new movies
-develop my "personal brand" (at least until i get aforementioned job)
-drink an egg cream
-do volunteer work
-eat at a restaurant featured on the food network

thoughts? suggestions?! your own personal goals?

i leave you with this winning outfit from miss she's-just-being-miley (and her sketchball, fame-whore boyfriend justin gaston). tbh, i kind of love this look....minus those HIDEOUS tights. yikes!

defriending: the ultimate betrayal

i would really like to address a phenomenon that, after some discussion with friends, is apparently just as disturbing and offensive to others as it is to me.

it starts as a classic college routine: you attend a friend's party/shindig/get together or meet someone that you have a nice lil' chat with on the first day of classes, and one of you adds the other as a friend on facebook. unfortunately, for whatever reason, your friendship never develops beyond that point. fine, whatever, at least you can still stalk each other on facebook, you think! no biggie. until one day when you a) decide to see what so-and-so is up to or b) you see that they wrote on a friend's wall and try to click and see their profile, and facebook brutally rebuffs you by denying you access to their profile.

could it be? could you really have been "defriended"?! i mean, sure, you never talked to them since that initial exchange, and didn't really have any intention of doing so in the future, but c'mon, what kind of person literally goes through their list of facebook friends and specifically removes an innocent person with malicious intent like that?? it's pure evil, i say. and i vow never to delete anyone, no matter how annoying their frequent status updates are. it's just plain cruel!

...in other news, christmas was good. you know you're getting old when you get excited about a new coffee pot, carry-on bag, and external hard drive. siiiiigh. i also stuffed my face with la carreta yesterday with kristi, and we decided to see that will smith movie, "seven pounds." please, please see it. you won't understand it 'til the end, but what a fabulous, fabulous film.

all i know is that first, you've got to get mad.

I HAVE NEVER APPRECIATED ELECTRICITY MORE THAN I DO RIGHT NOW. seriously. on thursday night, this crazy ice storm knocked down trees, power lines, and telephone poles throughout central/northern mass and southern nh. subsequently, we lost power for FOUR DAYS and FIVE NIGHTS. i know, i sound like i'm being dramatic, but you have no idea how much you depend on power until it's gone, man.

fortunately, on friday, i went to see the nutcracker in boston as planned, and ate a delicious meal at the cheesecake factory, but it was all downhill from there. apparently, without my cable tv/internet/flat iron/heat and hot water, i am a huge biotch. in my quest to access the internet, i drove to the local coffeehouse on saturday- seriously, this place never has more than 3 people in it at one time- and it was totally packed. unfortunately, no one could connect to the internet, so it was just a bunch of angry people asking each other "is it working for you?" i drove to the panera parking lot to see if i could swipe wifi there- still a no go. apparently, sending an e-mail was a much more difficult task than i anticipated, and i was fumin'. but as of 6am this morning, i rejoiced to the high heavens because the power finally came back. it was pretty amusing because this storm literally knocked out electricity at over 200,000 houses, so basically all there was to do was christmas shop and commiserate with the other folks that looked like crap and hadn't had a shower in 3 days either. good stuff.

also, help! i'm enjoying hallmark christmas movies way too much.

they go from high school to high class...

first and foremost, i have to recognize that one of my favorite bands, phantom planet, recently decided to call it quits after 15 years- or, take an "indefinite hiatus," which is obviously never a good sign. though i'm bummed about the break-up, i'm happy that i at least got the opportunity to see them live a few times while they were still alive and kickin'.

speaking of bands, i was reading an article the other day that was naming off some of the worst band names ever- this list included such gems as puddle of mudd, crazy town, dogs die in hot cars, and does it offend you, yeah?...and it got me thinking about making my own personal list of worst (and best) band names as i scrolled through my ipod. so here it goes! oh, and if you have any suggestions of your own, please feel free to add 'em.

WORST:
the all-american rejects
amusement parks on fire
bow wow wow
chumbawumba
crash test dummies
death cab for cutie
foo fighters
forever the sickest kids
goo goo dolls
head like a kite
jimmy eat world
kajagoogoo
limp bizkit
panic at the disco
the pussycat dolls
rage against the machine
the receiving end of sirens
someone still loves you, boris yeltsin
volcano, i'm still excited

BEST:
alice in chains
black sabbath
the brian jonestown massacre
broken social scene
coheed & cambria
collective soul
guided by voices
hallelujah the hills
hot hot heat
kings of leon
marilyn manson
moving units
ok go
queens of the stone age
radiohead
semisonic
smashing pumpkins
talking heads
third eye blind
urge overkill

looks about even, i'd say!

can we talk about how i'm going to see the nutcracker this friday and i'm majorly excited? i know, i'm lame, but i haven't seen it since i was like 8.

when i crack that whip, everybody gon' trip

anybody watch the michael jackson-esque britney documentary on mtv last night?! i mean, she's kind of a ditz, but i still feel awful for the poor girl. i mean, imagine not even being able to leave your house for 10 years without being surrounded by creepy paparazzi? horrible. (p.s. i've had the chance to listen to the leak of her new album, circus, and aside from "womanizer", both the title track and "mmm papi"-yeah, stupid title and lyrics-are so addictive.)

thanksgiving was fun and low-key...my cousin and her boyfriend came up from florida, and my grandparents from massachusetts, and we watched the parade (RICK ASTLEY, fuck yes, varsity fanclub or whatever their name was, fuck no) and a "hell's kitchen" marathon and ate a ton and walked on the golf path.

after an amazing breakfast at my favorite new hampshire standby, parker's maple barn, i braved black friday- as i do every year because i'm a masochist and i love large, annoying crowds of people- with kristi. btw- what's up with the poor guy in long island at the wal-mart being killed?! people are idiots. anyways, i was saddened by the many empty 3.98 dvd racks at target, but i was NOT about to get up at 4am for the deals, so this was the price i paid. siiiigh. then i ogled the puppies in the pet store and decided that in addition to an american eskimo, i also want a west highland white terrier and or a pekingese. double sigh. we terrorized the poor employees at sportshoe center by laughing crazily and singing "angel" by amanda perez when it came on the radio there, and then ended the evening by feasting on thanksgiving leftovers, drinking wine, and watching "forgetting sarah marshall." just fabulous.

uhhh, since when did starbucks change their gingerbread latte to a gingersnap latte? tastes exactly the same to me, but i'm extremely curious about this switch.

if you're reading this, give me a song to download. i'm in semi-drought mode.

the spirit of a hustler and the swagger of a college kid.

the "wtf of the week" (and, well, the first one ever for this blog) goes to pete and ashlee wentz, who unfortunately went the way of apple, jermajesty, audio science, pilot inspektor, and tu morrow by naming their son "bronx mowgli." i mean, for some reason or another, i like you guys as a couple, but give the poor kid a fightin' chance! or at least arm him with some comebacks for the barrage of borough and jungle book-related jokes he's sure to get when he starts school. sheesh.

since when was it almost thanksgiving!? i popped in hanson's classic "snowed in" to try and get in the spirit of the holidays a couple days ago while baking some bread, and it just felt so wrong. IT'S TOO EARLY. can we rewind to labor day, please?

i'm also excited because before visiting that warhol exhibit i mentioned in my last entry, i finally got to experience the wonder of the legendary red arrow diner in manchester. it's one of those places that's been all over the food network and such, and i coincidentally ate my patty melt and mac 'n cheese in the seat that the tgi fridays/diners, drive-ins, and dives dude guy fieri sat in when he was there (i know because there was a plaque that said "guy fieri sat here." ha!) but the exhibit was also pretty great. it's just so sad to know that any ol' joe schmoe can now achieve the greatness of warhol by pressing a button on photoshop these days. boooo.

a strange phenomenon began in the past week, which involved me receiving like 4 compliments from women well over age 60 on my outfits and/or hair. i guess i really am becoming a granny?!

umm, anyone remember the little kid from "step by step," brendan? this is him now. oh lordy.

in the alley, it ain't that cheap

guys, i went to my grandparents' today to celebrate their 72nd anniversary. really, though?! i can't even imagine being 72, let alone being married for that long. but, i mean, while my grandma (who's 92) and grandpa (who's 95 and still driving!) have been experiencing some slight issues of old age as of late, it's so adorable to see how much they love each other after all of these years. awwww.

if i don't get out of new hampshire soon, i really might enter full-fledged townie-dom. though i had a great time with emily on our veritable chain restaurant bar-crawl last weekend, i'm becoming all too familiar with the TGI friday's crowd. yiikes! i also hit up a hockey game- my first in a very long time- to see the local AHL affiliate, the manchester monarchs, which was fantastic, if only for the fact that i got to drink beer while i watched attractive men beat each other up. tomorrow, i'm apparently going to see the warhol exhibit that i've been dying to see forever in manchester, so maybe exploring nh's rich culture (cough) ain't so bad. at least for now. but i interviewed with 3 places last week, so let's get with the program, people! i'm ready for my cubicle...now!

i finally made a long-overdue library trip and picked up the following books. the librarian seemed amused at the selection.

1. eat pray love
2. my jesus year: a rabbi's son wanders the bible belt in search of his own faith
3. yes, you're pregnant, but what about me? (kevin nealon's book)
4. buying in: the secret dialogue between what we buy and who we are

has anyone seen paris hilton's trainwreck of a show, "my new bff"? it's like "rock of love" meets "the search for elle woods" and the girls are dumb as rocks. love it.

i don't need a witness

so, i recommended this song- "look at me when i rock wichoo" by black kids- a few weeks ago, but i recently saw the video and had a flashback to saturday morning cartoons, which fits the song perfectly since it has such a retro vibe.



and my good friend jeff turned me on to this site the other day, so i thought i would mention it as well: it's called chictopia, and is basically a real-life "lookbook" where people can upload pictures of different outfits they wear. but the genius part is that they also have to list where each item is from. genius! my new obsession.

i'm biting my tongue- hard!- regarding the election, but it's no doubt a historical moment (as well as the official demise of unbiased journalism :) and i honest-to-god hope that obama is the best darn prez we've ever had. however, the one thing that really bothers me to see is that people are suddenly proclaiming that they are "finally proud of their country," as if they weren't before. your president doesn't dictate your patriotism, guys!

i think i got food poisoning from taco bell yesterday...grossss.

tell me somethin' i don't know.

welp, hot off the presses, my ethnic markets article was published today as the cover story for the local paper's food section....click on the beautiful bratwurst photo to read it if you so care to!

i still haven't figured out what i want to be for halloween, which ain't a good thing...though i decided that juno or jamie lynn spears could be pretty easy to pull off. ah, if only it were 2007 so i could do amy winehouse! while 2008 cracked-out amy v 2.0 could be quite amusing as well. i'm always the worst at coming up with costume ideas; i think it's mostly because halloween sneaks up on me before i even realize it. ideas, anyone?!

last week was quite interview-filled, and i'm confident employment is imminent. i'm pretty sure that's because i've stopped caring about finding a job at this point- at least, i've stopped obsessing over it!

and, just for laughs: the other day at wal-mart, i moseyed over to a tempting sample stand with some delicious-looking waffles, and was about to go for one when the following exchange took place:

old sample lady: "are you a provable 18?"
me: "um, i'm 22 years old."
osl: "well, we worry about food allergies with kids, you know."
me: (ignoring her and biting into the waffle)
osl: "say, you sure don't look 22! you look about 16 years old."
me: (glaring at her and blinking slowly)
osl: "i know you probably don't like hearing that now, but you will one day!"

ugggggh.

fire on the mountain!

ummmm so let's talk about how seeing hanson again was the greatest thing, ever. just a few points, but pictures and video tell the whole story pretty much.

-hanson fans (a.k.a. fansons for those in the know) are CERTIFIABLY INSANE. at least some of them are. camping out at 11am on friday for an 8pm saturday show? yeah, that's normal!

- the charity walks that hanson hold before each of their shows- the majority of my pictures and one video are from this walk- are such a great idea. basically, you walk a mile barefoot with hanson, and for each walker that registers, they'll donate a dollar to an african charity of your choice (aids research, clean water, shoes for children, etc.) about 350 people showed up to yesterday's walk, so it really adds up on a tour. so great.

-because i didn't want to deal with aforementioned fanson drama, christine and i get in line about five minutes before doors open, get into the venue, and waltz over to the mezzanine area and have basically the best view ever. haaa. BRILLIANCE. i will now make you look at 10 billion ridiculous pictures and two videos.

-oh, and btw, it was so cute because before they played "mmmbop", taylor thanked the fans for being with them for "over ten years" and i realized that "oh my god, i've loved hanson for half of my life." WEIRD. so proud of them.




















I DIE.












everybody else, my beloved opening band








OH and we met everybody else, basically amazing.